President Tinkerbell's First Inagural Speech
I was bored this moring while the baby slept, and even Edward Jackowski's ultimate fitness workout didn't take my mind off truffles and double chocolate cookies. People who have nannies should know better than to stack the deck against us with such things. After all, I am a paid stay-at-home-Mom with same needs and caloric desires as volunteer stay-at-homes... So, to channel my creative energies away from eating myself silly, I've birthed this Blog.
Read. Put the cookie down. Now go running (while a chuck roast is becoming pot roast in your slow cooker). You're me.
So the baby for whom I nanny, (in order to protect his secret identity I'm choosing to use his superhero name - DROOL MAN) is perfecting his tiny superskill today. He is teething, and thus producing such volumes of saliva as I know not what. Combine this with his ubiquitous party trick, blowing raspberries, and you get a soulful patch of drool-foam suspended between his cupid's bow mouth and his dimply wee chin. As they say in MasterCard ads, "Priceless."
If somehow you've ended up here by mistake, here are some things about me that pervade my thoughts. I'm getting married 7 weeks from tomorrow, my fiance and I bought a house (can you say, "Fixer Upper?") two weeks ago, and if my life were authored by J.M. Barrie, I would not, in point of fact, be cast as Tink. I'm much more of a Wendy. Not so glamorous as the green clad pixie, but very useful in my own way. Ask my own personal Peter Pan, Mr. Alexander Loth, for whose troop of Lost Boys I played mother on the Island Nation of Inebriation.
Kudos to Mr. Loth, by the way, for talking Kara into marrying him! Mazel Tov!
You might be wondering....
... why the references to Tinkerbell/the Pastry Pixie? I've clearly stated I'm a Wendy in this mythology. It's an apron. Purple, with Tink on it. Says "Pastry Pixie." For the record, I'm a certificate-holding pastry chef, but I hate the early mornings and the copious amounts of bullsh*t in professional kitchens, so.... I quit the AM shift and returned to nannying. Now here's a lucrative, pleasant, rewarding job!
It's not all "Nanny 911", and "The Nanny Diaries," or the Louise Woodward trial, or anything. I drive to the family's house in the morning. I spend the day with their baby. I go home to my newly acquired disaster in the 'burbs. I am paid regularly through a service. I get legitimate health care. Quite the racket.
Sleepy time. DF and I got ice cream, but we walked to the store, so that's good right?