Move Over Mary Poppins!

The real life adventures of one nanny, her husband, child, dogs, house, and whatever else crosses her path.

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Sunday, October 01, 2006

Witch in a Sh*tstorm!

**Author's note: 10/8/06: Sorry for the late pulishing on this now week-old entry - I forgot to publish it, which just makes me unreliable, as well as lazy**

To begin at the beginning, since I was a small child, too small actually remember exactly when, I have possessed snow globes. You know, a base of some kind, and a glass globe, full of some viscous liquid within which fake snow, glitter, or whatnot is suspended. Sometime in my preteen years, I recieved one of these with a black base, and inside the globe was a semi cute, quat, frumpy witch, and the "snow" in suspension was black, mixed with tiny black bats.

I still have this collection, now shelved in our yellow room - due to the lavish three bedroom domicile we share ::ahem:: we refer to our two guest rooms by color - where my husband, from time to time, has opportunity to contemplate it (usually coinciding with contemplating tearing out floorboards or a wall). Has subsequently nicknamed it the "witch in a shitstorm" after having shaken it, and decided that's what it looked like. He tried to coin the phrase for a short while, kind of in a "snakes on a plane!" way. Sadly, this new linguistic phenomenon didn't last out the week.

Today, I was in Lowe's, looking for paint color samples and a cheap 3" brush for Mark to apply pesticide to the exterior of the sill under the front of the house, when I actually saw the witch in a shitstorm, in all it's inflatable glory! Then, my eyes adjusted to the present and I realized it was a graveyard scene, not a witch, but seriously, people - giant inflatable "tornado" globes with bats and graveyards?

What ever happened to answering the door dressed as Frankenstein and handing out Mars bars with a Jack-O-Lantern on the porch? When did all the holidays get like this? And why, when I asked (le plus tongue-in-cheek) if there actually was one with a witch, did they tell me, with sincere apology, that I "should have bought it in July, before they sold out."



Anonymous Anonymous said...

this may be an activity for Mark... on my block there was one Dad who LOVED Halloween. He would dress as a scarecrow and sit on the front porch holding a bowl of candy. In the bowl, there was a sign that said "we're out, please take one". When a child took more than one (greedy little brat) he'd jump out of his lawn chair and scare the crap out of the little offender. I loved that guy. Who says there's nothing to do in Kansas

10/9/06, 9:12 PM  
Blogger legallyblonde29 said...

I think I hate Halloween... last year, we took Gav to just one house -- the neighbor's across the street -- and the son's girlfriend opened the door with a scary mask on... it took hours before Gav stopped crying. I'm not sure he'll even try trick-or-treating this year... Why is scaring little kids supposed to be fun?

10/10/06, 9:55 AM  
Blogger dasein668 said...

Stupid holiday.

Of course, I think ALL holidays are stupid, so there you go.

10/10/06, 12:02 PM  
Blogger CDG said...

i don't think i was taken trick-or-treating until i was like 4... to avoid just those kinds of tragedies... poor gav. on the whole, though, i still love Halloween. He should come to Beacon Hill. Everyone gets into it, and there are tons of kids, and people are really cool - especially to the little ones. This year, my monkeys are going as a knight, a princess, and a dragon, ages respectively. Too frickin' cute!

10/11/06, 6:44 PM  

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